Saturday, June 30, 2012

My worst date

As a disability advocate and woman with cerebral palsy, the most common questions that I receive are about relationships. Where do I find guys? What are the most memorable dates? How do I handle dating with CP? These are just a few questions and I'd thought I'd start by the most funny one: What were the worst dates I've been on?

Probably the worst date I've been on happened right before I met Jeff. I talked to this guy online for two weeks. He was in his forties, had a son, divorced. He wasn't exactly what I was looking for but we had interesting conversations and he was funny. I also liked how he spoke about his son and fatherhood. He asked me out to dinner.

I got all ready, my friend babysat. I thought even if I didn't hit it off romantically - we could relate as friends. We never really discussed cerebral palsy a whole lot but he knew enough not to be shocked.

So another friend dropped me off at the restaurant. I looked in the mirror and saw I thought I looked good. I went inside and he was seated. I sat across from him. He never offered to take my jacket. He smiled but I knew he was strangely uncomfortable.

He ordered and I ordered a drink. I could tell he was in no way ready to feed me and I didn't want him too. He sat there and didn't say a word. The food came. He ate and his hands shook when asking to just put a straw in my cup. I tried asking questions and trying to have conversation. Nothing.

It was the longest hour. Then he quickly paid the bill, said goodbye and didn't even ask if my ride was there.

I was so happy to get in my van, laugh at the situation and hope for better dates in the future.

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