Changes in us

When I met Jeff, I was 33 and he was 29! I felt very old compared to him. I was a widow with a two year old. He was single and living life to the fullest. I was too serious and he was too carefree. Somehow we balanced each other out.

He opened me back up that life wasn't all bleak and bad endings. Life can be gentle, kind and fun. Something I lost in a 5 year difficult abusive marriage. I grounded him that family life is fun and rewarding. Structure and routine doesn't have to confine your life but enhance it.

Up until about a year ago, we liked getting to go out without Laura and taking more adult trips. Then something switched. Now it's more enjoyable to have her with us and when she's not, we really, really miss her. Don't get me wrong that date nights are still essential for a relationship. However, we toned down our craziness.

He has been a wonderful help with my pregnancy sickness and Laura. He tries to make me food I'll eat and cleans up everything after I get sick without complaining. He's very supportive.

Jeff has really transformed. He researches baby furniture and talks about budgets. Today is his birthday. Last night we went out dancing for his birthday. We went to our normal place but it felt anything but normal. I felt queasy and out of place.

He is 33 - the same age I was when we met. He's not doing anything wild or crazy. He's making room in our room for my computer so we can start putting together a nursery. He already purchased a swing from a consignment store and we've been to baby furniture stores.

This is a new adventure for all of us - kindergarten and a new baby! Dancing shoes might get dusted off again in about a year but we will have fun!


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